61

Public Notices / Re: Issues of the Conch Champion (For public reading)

« on: October 08, 2021, 12:25:41 am »

The Conch Champion.  Independent & Accurate, Always.

Editor's Note
I have received many complaints of late that the office of the Conch Champion is all but impossible to find.  Therefore I am currently working on moving our office to a more visible location.  Let it not be said that I ignore complaints!  I will inform you, beloved readers, of the new location once it has been secured. 

Meanwhile reporter Soppira Hellsworth has conducted another interview, this time with Kardeen, West Conch's priest of Tyche.  Please read and enjoy!

-G.Morton, editor.

Interview With a Tychean #2
After my recent interview with Priestess Kaylie of Upper Conch's temple, I spoke with Kardeen of the temple in West Conch.  Kardeen is an interesting specimen with red eyes, misshapen ears and a swarthy complexion.  He is clearly of mixed but unknown heritage and culture and he has numerous facial piercings.  He seems to be constantly simmering with suppressed rage but I noted that he never completely lost his temper.

SH: Hello Priest Kardeen, thank you for speaking with the Conch Champion today.  Oh, Priestess Kaylie says 'hi'.
K: [grunts in irritation].  She and I were ordained together.  Her faith is genuine, but her interpretation of Lady Fortune's ways is repulsive bullshit.
SH: Excuse me?
K: Her prosperity doctrine about unearned wealth being proof of Tyche's favour is just convenient crap for the useless and parasitic idle rich of uptown.
SH: Tell us then what you preach about Tyche.
K: Tyche brings good luck to those with the courage to defy tyrants and to work hard to better their own situation and that of their community.  She smites with bad luck those who seek to hurt or oppress her faithful.  She cares not a whit for bloated rich maggots sitting on their inheritances and investments.  She is the perfect patron for West Conch and its people, which have both been abandoned by the rest of the city.   [stands up and roars as if giving a sermon]  Here in the slums I preach the TRUE word of Tyche!  I encourage and support my flock as they stand up to the bullies here and those in other districts who look down upon us.  I protect my brothers and sisters with Tyche's holy blessings and curse their enemies with misfortune! 

[Kardeen's skin flushes and his eyes actually glow as his anger and passion rises.  It is clear that he is not completely human]

SH: Tell us a little more about yourself, Kardeen.  You clearly have a great love for your parishioners, but you were born elsewhere, yes?
K:  Yes.  I was. 
SH: Who were your parents?  Some people say you are a tiefling, others that you have some drow or orcish ancestry. 
K: [snaps] Who I was does not matter!  The past is an illusion.  All that exists is the present and all that matters is what we do here and now. 
SH: Please, just for the sake of the Champion's readers who are curious.  Tell us what you are willing or able. 
K: [grunts testily] Fine.  I was born in the woods.  I never knew my father, and my mother is a truly despicable woman who kept me in a cage.  Literally in a cage.  A vision of Tyche gave me the courage to break free and escape.  I came here and preached Tyche's word in a corner of the slums, and slowly my flock grew from a few to dozens then hundreds.  Eventually Her church learned of me and  offered me proper training as a cleric, and the funding to start building the modest temple you see here today.  Many of my flock are trapped and oppressed like I was, and I strive to give them the strength and courage to stand up to their oppressors. 

[Kardeen's flinty voice softens as he speaks of his flock and his temple, and his love for them is evident.  The fierce glow in his eyes dims]

SH: What are your current concerns for your parish and West Conch in general?
K: Everything.  We are bearing the brunt and blame for the plague of rats.  Many here are already on the brink of poverty or starvation, and the crows are now reducing harvests and driving up food prices.  Diiri's Boys are running the district now, but they're batshit insane and nobody outside the gang really understands them.  Children disappear here sometimes and we don't know why.  Racial segregation is pushing all the orcs, kobolds, hobgoblins and everything else in this one section of town, which inevitably increases tensions.  The Conch Council always spends more on uptown and the markets, so we can't ever improve things.  Basically, we're always getting shit on here in West Conch.  I'm surprised you had the balls to even come here for the interview.
SH: Whatever it takes to get the story, I say.  I'll be interviewing your fellow priest Zolo next.
K: [inexplicably roars with laughter] You're going to interview Zolo?!  Really?  I might actually buy your newspaper to read that one.
SH: Um... very well.  Thank you for speaking with us today, Kardeen. 
K: [continues laughing]

END

62

Journals & Backgrounds / Re: Eliezra Baldwin's File

« on: October 07, 2021, 06:04:11 am »

Whilst foraging for herbs in the wilderness I found Pearl doing the same thing.  I don't know the region around Conch well at all yet so gratefully accepted Pearl's offer to show me some good sites to collect herbs.  For someone so small she is quite lethal, and the two of us were more than a match for any wandering creatures that stumbled upon us. 

Pearl seems to have good contacts in Upper Conch.  She mentioned Gabby or Gabriella who is a student at Nebular and a keen herbalist and alchemist.  Pearl also knows Apprentice Sithmore there, and as it turns out Sithmore is "the captain" Pearl mentioned the first time we met.  There was another person she simply referred to as 'Z'.  Overall it sounds like there are some friendly and decent folk in uptown, although Ostian assures me that there are many despicable ones there too.  He was an archivist and census taker, so I suppose he would know these things. 

I think my health has recovered enough to take up whatever path it is the Broken God has marked me for.  But it's frustrating me how limited my skills are.  I can't heal with magic like Mylene, and worst of all I lack the natural talent to even learn the basics of it from her.  Instead I must rely on mundane trappings like herbs and dressings to heal and cure others.  If I have a natural talent it seems to be for fighting, but how could violence be doing my god's work?

63

Journals & Backgrounds / Re: Eliezra Baldwin's File

« on: October 05, 2021, 06:14:23 am »

I met another of the local adventurers, this time an elf lady named Apprentice Sithmore.  She is a student at Nebular as well as a ship's captain.  Our initial meeting was a little awkward, for she was standing at the gates I intended pass through and she was heavily and visibly warded with defensive enchantments.  She seemed curious about me, and asked if I was wearing a veil for cultural reasons.  Sithmore was also a little surprised that I still live in the slums now that I have the income to equip myself heavily. 

None the less she was quite pleasant and when I mentioned my interest in herbalism she took me on a journey to some locations in elven lands which had some rare herbs.  We encountered some orc raiders but Sithmore's enchantments (which she shared with me) proved very powerful.  My devotion to the Broken God gained her attention and at the end of the journey she gifted me with a truly fine blade.  I must say that the adventurers of Conch I have met so far are nothing like the local newspaper we use to light our fires and wallpaper our shacks claims. 

The trip left me in Hadrian's south bank, and I ventured alone around that settlement.  I found a Moanderite lair in a noxious labyrinth to the west of the town.  There were too many abominations for me to completely purge alone but I destroyed many of them.  Walking those smelly, spiraling crypts while fighting through shambling and pitiable slaves of Moander was a distasteful experience for me, as much for personal as physical reasons.  Hadrian seems a city no less plagued with evil than Conch and I regretted that I could not stay long.  But my duties in West Conch must take precedence. 

64

Journals & Backgrounds / Re: Giona Morton's Little Black Book

« on: October 03, 2021, 06:59:32 am »

2.  Man-Bat.
IT'S REAL.  I saw it, fought it and slew it.  But it must regenerate and haunt basements once again, or there is possibly a massive cult of Men-Bats.  Possibly/probably a Selunite cult.  I dare not retract my editorial stance that Man-Bat is a hoax.  I am so beloved that the whole town would suffer if my reputation were to take a blow.

65

Journals & Backgrounds / Re: Eliezra Baldwin's File

« on: September 30, 2021, 01:04:09 am »

On a whim I explored some of the mining tunnels just outside the city walls.  I followed a scent of brimstone and discovered to my horror a nest of fiends.  Predominantly they were disease-ridden manes, but even more offensive were the torture-adoring kocrachons supervising them.  In charge of this small colony was a fiendish foreman who was utterly jubilant in the pestilence and agony his charges were working on.  Though alone, I trusted in my abilities and with some effort I purged the creatures.  I have no doubt they will return, for the stench of brimstone and rot was as strong as ever. 

I wandered the markets afterwards and pondered that such evil could dwell so close to the city.  That was a rather naive thing to think I quickly realised.  At the bazaar I saw some disturbing things for sale.  There were pungent Moanderite relics- preserved body parts of one of their "holy" men the seller assured me.  These offended me on a personal level due to my own long illness which was caused by a Moanderite. 

Also alarming were some ecclesiastical Loviatarian whips for sale.  This is a religion that baffles me more than any other.  I've heard that they gouge and flay flesh (their own and that of others) in their rituals and take orgiastic joy in hurting people physically and emotionally.  I don't judge what people do to themselves for there is often some trauma driving it, but to take pleasure inflicting agony upon others is... grotesque.

66

Journals & Backgrounds / Re: Eliezra Baldwin's File

« on: September 27, 2021, 11:23:35 am »

We've moved Mylene to a safer but still close location.  She's elderly and never backs down from a bully.  With Diiri's Boys on edge I've been worried about her because I know they wouldn't hesitate to cripple her if she stood up to them.  I thought she would be furious with us but she was actually pleased that she can focus more on healing and preaching now.  She is the closest thing we have to a spiritual leader and true healer and we would be lost without her. 

Today whilst at a stall I met one of the small folk, an adventurer named Pearl.  She was quite resplendent in magenta armour and also very kind.  She was in a hurry and mentioned she had to go meet "the captain".  A sailor perhaps, then.  I haven't been on a boat since I made the trip to Conch and the idea of sailing by choice rather than by trickery sounds interesting.  I think I'd be too worried about the ocean breeze blowing my veil off though. 
 

67

Public Notices / Re: Issues of the Conch Champion (For public reading)

« on: September 27, 2021, 10:56:49 am »

The Conch Champion.  Independent & Accurate, Always.

Man-Bat is a Myth!
Dear readers it has been over two weeks since I issued my plea for evidence, witness accounts and sketches of Conch's infamous "Man-Bat".  As I expected, not a single credible piece of proof of his existence has passed across my desk!  I therefore confidently assert that this beast is what I have claimed all along- an insidious hoax perpetrated upon the good citizens of Conch by the adventuring "community"!  I wonder now what other urban legends they are responsible for.  The Piper of the sewers, the giant centipedes of the slums, rampaging animated furniture in Uptown... could all of these outlandish rumours simply be self-serving scams run by racketeering adventurers? 

I have been busy the past few days in and around Conch.  Being the rugged, salt-of-the-earth gentleman I am, I spent some time volunteering in the fields and orchards of the Creek Farms.  I was picking apricots in an orchard at one point, stripped to my muscular waist naturally, when I was attacked by a flock of crows!  As if this was not bad enough they seemed to be directed by a kenku.  I dispatched the creature with little effort of course.  Upon searching it I found it carried the type of restorative potions typically carried by adventurers and noted that its weapon was a "Moon on a Stick" which are often carried by Selunite pilgrims.  One can only wonder whether there is any link between this experience of mine and the plague of crows blighting Conch.

My other experience of note happened whilst taking a casual walk in West Conch.  Whilst in the north west corner of the slums, I was pushing myself through a gaggle of work-shy panhandlers (hard work always brings success in my experience, so beggars can only be lazy), but then espied an interesting sign.  It seems a new temple is under construction in this dilapidated area of Conch.  Could this be the new temple of Jergal we heard rumours about some time ago?  Or is a new deity joining the temples of Conch?  Either way, I would welcome further information.

-G.Morton, editor.


Covington Revealed?
The Nebular University has reportedly dispatched an expedition to locate the legendary vanished village of Covington.  While it is not clear yet whether or not they were successful the very fact that they felt there was enough evidence to send personnel is significant.  The existence of Covington is much-debated by local historians and folklorists and they are eagerly awaiting confirmation whether "the Lost Village" is real or not. 

-S.Hellsworth, reporter.


Band Splits
Music lovers of Conch are despairing at the news that popular duo Swords & Daisies have broken up.  Equally popular in taverns and theatres, the band have entertained residents for many years with their inspirational yet ferocious musicianship.  Mandolin player Grady Swords states that he had despaired of singer Daisy Bastian's infamous tardiness and hookah habit so broke up the band.  Meanwhile, Bastian insists that the breakup was her decision and was due to Swords being " a moral sewer with a face like a bucket of frogspawn".  Both are reportedly working on successor projects but must first resolve ownership of the "Swords & Daisies" name.  They are due to appear before Justice Oswald Schenker next month. 

-A.Nutt, reporter.


Chained Procession
Several residents of Conch have informed the Champion that they have witnessed groups of people moving around surreptitiously after dark.  The accounts are remarkably similar and indicate that an unknown faction is forcibly moving small groups of people between houses under the cover of darkness.  The people being moved were reportedly chained together and clearly unhappy about their situation.  District Authorities are investigating but thus far have not made any headway. 

-P.Krellin, reporter. 

68

Journals & Backgrounds / Re: Eliezra Baldwin's File

« on: September 24, 2021, 10:37:19 pm »

Another successful exploration of the city completed.  I am still avoiding Upper Conch because of Ostian's warnings.  However I have had my first glimpses of the plagues of crows and rats which I have heard about.  There seems to be some malign intelligence driving these events which was obvious even in my first encounters.  Apparently the Nebular University is investigating both matters.  In any case, we have other problems.

Something happened recently that has made Diiri's Boys even more paranoid and brutish than usual.  Some of our group have heard an attempt was made on the life of the Boys' derro leader, others that their infamous stimulants and soul-gems are becoming dangerously unreliable.  Whatever the truth is the Boys have increased their security (if you can call more patrolling thugs "security") and are calling in debts.  Arlow had an old debt to them and when he couldn't pay they broke his leg in several places.  There were splinters of bone poking through the skin when we found him.  We've reset the leg and rigged up a brace for it but unless we can take him to Kardeen, Arlow will be recuperating a long time. 

I've made a few contacts in my explorations at least.  The local herbalist, Pallat, is a cheerful lass and has been supplying us with medicinal herbs.  Over in the Market District I found an apprentice smith named Dorindra who can supply us with affordable equipment for self-defence.  I think we're going to need it. 

69

Journals & Backgrounds / Re: Eliezra Baldwin's File

« on: September 23, 2021, 06:26:34 am »

I was feeling much better today so went for a longer outing on the streets and outskirts of Conch.  The slums do not have a monopoly on suffering, I found, though naturally we have it much worse in most respects.  I sent a message out for a mentor. Ostian insisted I make it as cryptic as possible.  That seems rather pointless but I followed his advice for now. 

More importantly I won my first real victory.  Last time I ventured out from our camp I was grievously wounded by a mutant which was seemingly the priest of some chiropteran god.  The first time we crossed paths he ambushed me from the shadows, which were too murky for my still blurry eyesight to penetrate.  He wielded two blades and I had not been trained against such an opponent.  He took fiendish glee in the injuries he inflicted upon me.  I could not even hold my ground, let alone strike him back.  Only by the Broken God's mercy did I escape that time.

But this time was different.  I had scraped together enough money to improve my equipment somewhat.  My keen eyesight has returned and I instantly spotted the villain hiding in a corner and charged him.  I found my reactions had now recovered enough not only to parry his attacks but to counterattack.  He fell to my blade and I could tell by the fear in his eyes as he died that he did not find the experience of feeling pain as joyous as that of inflicting it. 

70

Public Notices / Re: Issues of the Conch Champion (For public reading)

« on: September 17, 2021, 03:27:13 am »

The Conch Champion.  Independent & Accurate, Always.

Interview with a Tychean
Below is my transcript of an interview I conducted with the popular Priestess Kaylie of the Temple to Tyche in Upper Conch.  She is an attractive and diminutive half-elven woman with curly blonde hair and an infectiously cheery personality.  Even a few personal questions did not dent her happy resolve.
-S. Hellsworth, reporter.

SH: Good morning priestess, thank you for taking the time to speak with me. 
K: No, thank YOU!  What an absolute pleasure it is for me to have this blessed opportunity.
SH: Your mother is the famous soprano Mirella, who was decreed the Bard of Conch a record twelve consecutive years.  Did you feel any pressure to follow in her footsteps?
K: I did actually immerse myself in music for many years before I felt the call to study for the priesthood here.  But there was no pressure on me... why it was an  honour that Lady Fate chose to place me in such a blessed family situation. 
SH: Mirella was a single human mother when she had a fling with an elf noble who passed through town, a union which produced you.  What is it like to grow up with parents of two different races?
K:  It was a wondrous experience which I will be forever grateful for.  It was due to Fortune's Smile that my parents met, even if they were together ever so briefly.  My mother has always had such an overflowing abundance of love for me that the absence of my father was barely noticed by me.  Honestly, I was blessed from the start to be born into such a loving family situation.

[I pause to gather my thoughts for the next questions.  Kaylie gives me a patient yet dazzling smile]

SH: As I hinted earlier, Mirella already had a child from a previous relationship when she met your father.
K:  Yes, my half-sister Danica. 
SH: I've heard that this "loving family situation" is remembered rather differently by her.  Town gossip says that you and her have a ferocious rivalry.  Danica herself claims that you've just imitated her your whole life and even stole this job you have from her.  What do you have to say about these things?
K: I really feel for poor Danica.  It's not her fault she feels a little bitter or resentful towards me.  Yes, she pointed the way for me in a lot of areas, such as singing, dancing, and the Tychean faith.  It must be very hard for her that I've consistently proven so much better than her in every single one of them.  [Kaylie smiles pityingly a moment, before her dazzling grin returns]  But I didn't steal this job from her, the priests simply decided that I was the better candidate.
SH: I am told that Danica accused the priests of choosing you simply because you donated a large amount from your elven father's inheritance to the church and you physically appear more like some depictions of Tyche than her, not because of any spiritual merit.
K: Yes she did.  Amongst other less savoury accusations.  But even if that one claim is true, surely would that not be even more proof that I was Lady Fate's preferred choice?  For luck blessed me with features like hers and she blessed me again with the fortune of my father's money.  And luck is the currency of the goddess. 

[I move on to my next questions, noting that unlike many interviewees Kaylie has not been even slightly irked by "the bomb question"]

SH: Your personal interpretation of Tyche has been described as a little unorthodox but has proven wildly popular here in Upper Conch.  Can you explain it and the appeal it possesses?
K:  I don't find it unorthodox or controversial at all.  I preach that Tyche rewards effort and faith and often does so via material rewards.
SH: So all of the wealthy parishioners here in Upper Conch, whether they be businessmen, intellectuals or simply born rich have been blessed for their effort?  Doesn't that seem like a stretch to you in the last example?
K: Not at all!  Some have been rewarded for the daring and efforts of their ancestors and are born into fortunate circumstances.  Like myself.  And the others have been blessed in their own efforts with good fortune in their investments and employment. 
SH: But you can understand surely how the less affluent people of West Conch, whether Tychean or not, might see that as awfully convenient?
K: Perhaps, but I believe that Tyche chose me for this district of Conch.  Should the people of West Conch be feeling spiritually or materially unfulfilled, they have my colleague Priest Kardeen there to soothe their woes. 
SH: I am planning to interview him soon, so perhaps I will discuss the matter further with him.  Thank you, Priestess Kaylie, for speaking to the Conch Champion today. 
K: [cheerfully]  You should do that!  Tell him I said hi.  Have a lovely day!

END

71

Public Notices / Re: Issues of the Conch Champion (For public reading)

« on: September 13, 2021, 02:03:44 am »

The Conch Champion.  Independent & Accurate, Always.

Upcoming Interviews
Soppira Hellsworth's recent interview with Kerrar of the Scales was well-received by readers.  Therefore she has been assigned to a weekly interview column highlighting notable residents of Conch.  This week, her subject is local legend Sir Theodore Capstick.
-G. Morton, editor.

A Chat With Sir Theo
Below is a transcript of my recent interview with Sir Theodore Capstick.  We spoke in his usual haunt of the Whispering Tree inn, near the famous trophy which was named after him.  Sir Theo is still a burly and powerful man despite his age and twirled his legendary huge moustache compulsively throughout our conversation. 
-S. Hellsworth, reporter.

TC: Be a good girl and get me a drink, will you?  I've got that Hellsworth lad from the local rag coming any minute. 
SH: That's me, Sir Capstick.  I'm Soppira Hellsworth from the Conch Champion.
TC: Oh a working girl I see.  Good for you!  How did that happen?  You barren?  Ohhh... you don't like gents, right? [winks]
SH: We're actually here today to talk about you, not me Sir Capstick.
TC: [booming laugh] Well naturally!  Call me Sir Theo, dear.  What would you like to know?
SH: It's well known that you were bestowed a knighthood by the Empire for many years of hunting dangerous animals and monsters.  Why did you become a monster hunter?
TC: When I was just a scrub, my father tried to encourage my reading by giving me a set of books written by Mannfred Von Darkmoor.  He was a monster hunter over a century ago.  Very famous in his day.  He hunted giants and vampires around Hadrian and Hilltop.  Was never on the right side of the authorities, sadly.  But I found his books inspiring. 

[A serving girl brings a tray of drinks and Sir Theo takes a long swig of ale.  Somehow not a drop of foam clings to his immense moustache]

SH: So then you decided you wanted to hunt monsters when you grew up.
TC: Grew up?!  Gods no!  I got started right away.  I wrestled and pinned my first goblin when I was but a lad of five!  I was crotch-punching orcs before I hit eight.  Singlehandedly hunting down, slaying and skinning packs of wolves before twelve!  Escalation, dear.  To stay famous, one must constantly exceed one's own achievements in some manner. 
SH: You professionally hunted monsters for money and fame for forty years before you retired.  What was your greatest hunt?  And why did you retire?
TC: I simply can't pick just ONE hunt as my greatest.  How could I split such great moments as when I slew an adult hydra by bashings its heads together?  The time I defeated an entire ogre tribe by ritually arm-wrestling every single one of them in turn?  The time I thrashed a dragon to death using the severed tail of its juvenile as a whip?
SH: And your retirement?
TC: I didn't retire because I wanted to, I retired because I had to.  The hundreds of injuries and poisonings over so many hunts take a toll.  Some good comrades of mine had died over the years too.  I was slowing down, and didn't feel I could match my old feats anymore.  At that point, what's the bloody use of it all? [shrugs in apparent distress]
SH: But it wasn't the end of your fame.
TC: Not at all.  The Empire was sufficiently impressed by my body of work to award me an honorary knighthood.  The innkeeper here is one of my greatest fans and offered me free lodging and drink for life.  I get to sign autographs and regale fans with my tales every night.  But still, I miss the old days.  That's why I created the Capstick Cup.
SH: And what is the Capstick Cup?
TC: [seriously] Why it is the most prestigious award a resident of Conch could ever hope to receive.  I award it regularly to any with the bollocks to impress me by hunting down a seriously dangerous quarry.  The trophy carries a sort of inherent magic of its own, probably due to being designed by and depicting myself,  and will make the winner an even greater hunter.  I'd like to make it a regular monthly event, actually. 

[Sir Theo and I look upon the display version of this trophy which sits proudly at the inn.  It is quite an impressive sculpture depicting a shirtless Sir Theo in his prime battling a wyvern]

TC: That happened up on Patrician Peak.  Never saw so many bloody wyverns before or ever again.  We lost a few good adventurers on that hunt.  That reminds me... why does that blasted paper of yours hate adventurers so damn much?
SH: That's editorial policy, it really has nothing to do with me.  You'd have to take it up with Mr Morton. 
TC: I think I bloody will.  Tell me though lass... is having a long gander at that statue of me near stark nude making you reconsider your preferences?
SH: I think we'll end it there, Sir Theo.  Thank you for talking to the Conch Champion.

END

72

Public Notices / Re: Issues of the Conch Champion (For public reading)

« on: September 11, 2021, 03:40:02 am »

The Conch Champion.  Independent & Accurate, Always. 

A Brief Pilgrimage Completed
Hello again dear readers!  I apologise for my absence last week.  The newspaper owner advised me to take a short trip back to my hometown to "recharge and remember why you do this work".  I took the time to visit my ill wife, my son's grave, the temple and some general sites about Hadrian.  Pleasingly, the owner's advice was astute and I have returned with more zeal than ever.  I am grateful to return to Conch for it is a lively town.  It is said that Hadrian was equally lively once, but alas that was over a century ago, before Lunatics began to drag it down.

Many citizens send me tipoffs about various things unscrupulous people have done in the region, and I found quite a few new ones upon my desk on my first day back at work.  Several related to a dangerous place: the ruins of the fallen Valstiir enclave.  It seems that various adventuring parties have once more begun delving into that area and bringing back trinkets to sell in the Market District.  While this would seem dangerous only to the adventurers themselves, a few were allegedly boasting about indiscriminately jumping around planes using the still operational portals there.  This is the sort of tomfoolery that brought down the enclave and exactly the dangerous nonsense I would expect adventurers to be up to their necks in.

I also noticed upon my return that one other issue has not left the bars, alleys and other gossip venues of Conch.  Despite my assurances that the Man-Bat of Conch is a scam perpetrated by adventurers I see that reports of his existence stubbornly continue.  Therefore I appeal to readers: bring me pictures of Man-Bat!  I encourage all to send their concept art, sketches and eyewitness accounts to my editorial desk.  Let us all see how consistent this evidence truly is.  I look forward to seeing your submissions!

-G. Morton, editor
(OOC: anyone interested can post Man-Bat art or stories in the letters to the editor thread)

The Uptown Rats
The Conch Champion has it on good authority that a home in Upper Conch has suffered such a serious infestation of rodents that the entire building was almost written off.  The owner of the home is not known though persistent rumours state it belongs to a local celebrity.  Rat infestations are a rare occurrence in Upper Conch and residents are deeply concerned that the rat plague of West Conch is spreading beyond control. 

-S. Hellsworth, reporter.


Blood Farming
Market District residents have told the Conch Champion that several corpses have been found in the docks of the Creek Farms.  While this is distressing enough, adding to the horror is the revelation that they all appeared to have been exsanguinated.  First term Nebular student Pandora Voust was one of the poor souls who claimed to have stumbled upon some of these bodies.  "I came here thinking Conch was a quiet place," Miss Voust said.  "I wouldn't have come here from Saharelgard to study if I knew things like this happened here too."  WNTC however said that it has investigated the matter and found no substance to any of these stories. 

-A.Nutt, reporter.


Hope Where Before There Was None
The Last Hope road is an infamously dangerous trek, but good news has arrived for travellers.  A new rest stop has been constructed at the request of the Council of Conch.  This will give caravans one more safe place to camp along the road and it is the most distant outpost along the road yet.  Although the facilities are currently simple but functional, they will be expanded as funds permit.  Currently caravan and airship stops, herb gardens and camp sites are the main services there, all protected by low but strong walls. 

-P. Krellin, reporter.

73

Public Notices / Re: Issues of the Conch Champion (For public reading)

« on: September 06, 2021, 04:33:44 am »

The Conch Champion.  Independent & Accurate, Always.

Editor on Leave
Our respected editor Giona Morton has been on personal leave this weekend. He has taken a brief vacation to visit his ailing wife and their son's grave.  Therefore there will be no editorial this week but we can offer something almost as good: an exclusive interview by gun reporter Soppira Hellsworth!

Kerrar and the Scales
Below is the transcript of my recent interview with the half-dragon Kerrar, leader of "the Scales", a minor gang of West Conch composed mostly of kobolds, lizardfolk and a few humans.  This is the first time Kerrar has ever spoken to the press.  During the interview we were served refreshments by Kerrar's kobold servants and he was flanked at all times by lizardfolk bodyguards.  A beautiful female yuan-ti pureblood sat beside him, cuddling Kerrar and patting his hand soothingly when his temper shortened.   As for Kerrar himself, he is a towering winged creature with ice-blue scales and a spiny dewlap beneath his chin.  He comes across as emotional, self-absorbed but in possession of a magnetic personality and a remarkable voice.
-S.Hellsworth, reporter.

SH: I thank you for agreeing to speak with me today, Kerrar. 
K: As well you should.  It is not often I, Kerrar, lower myself to speak with you smooth-skins.
SH: You have been in Conch for a few months now, but very little is actually known about you.  Would you care to tell us about your background?
K: Ugh.  What's to tell?  I am the product of a broken home.  My mother was a dear but my father is a grotesque bully who beat us both.  The only thing I learned from him was an intense hatred of all bullies.  I truly loathe them.  My mother died from one of his beatings, so I ran away from him and ended up here
SH: And then you founded a minor gang
K: [bellows] MINOR?!  How dare you!
SH: Look, all I'm saying is that the Scales lack the numbers and territory that, say,  Diiri's Boys have.
K: Bah!  Posers!  Hacks!  And so distressingly  lacking in scales!
SH: Can you please explain that last remark?  Why is whether they have scales or not so important?
K: [sighs] I can't believe I need to explain this.
SH: Please, the readers want to know.
K: Fine.  You see, scales are the most beautiful adornment that one could ever possibly wear upon one's skin!  Velvet, silk, satin... these are mere pitiful attempts at bettering the divine perfection of scales.  Naturally my own scales would surely be the most glorious in this entire city.  I look at you dear, and see you are quite pretty for a human... and yet all I can think is that you would be utterly breathtaking if you had scales.
SH: Well thank you, Kerrar.  Unfortunately it's extremely rare for humans to have scales, except due to curses or disease. 
K: Ah but you're wrong there!  I have several human members in my new family here.  And thanks to their frankly unsurprising devotion to my glorious self, they have branded, tattooed or cut scales into their own skin.  It makes me so proud!

[Kerrar wipes a tear from his eye and sighs happily as he contemplates his new family.  His kobold servants take the opportunity to refill our drinks.  One overfills Kerrar's drink and it spills it on the table.  Kerrar brutally backhands the kobold and sends it flying into a wall.  There is a sickening crunch of bone.  The kobold lays there whimpering as the interview continues]

SH: Ah... well... personally I'd rather not do that to myself.
K: A shame.  I am looking for another bride  for my harem so my family can have another mother.  I am finding that one simply isn't enough for my rowdy children.  But you just blew your one chance I'm afraid.
[the yuan-ti glares at me first with jealousy, then smug superiority]
SH: A sadness that will stay with me forever, I assure you.  You keep saying the word "family".  That's how you see your gang?
K: Yes!  They are my family, and I am their adoptive father.  I protect them from the other gangs who, believe me, are all run by HORRIBLE BULLIES who abuse their followers.  I'm not like that.  I offer those with scales and those willing to gain them a fresh start in a supportive environment.  Kobolds, lizardfolk, yuan-ti, troglodytes, marked smooth-skins... all are welcome here.
SH: Finally Kerrar, what are your plans for the future?
K: Oh, I'm sure Grymtol would love to see that in print.  How stupid do you think I am? [bellows and snorts cold mist from his nostrils].  HOW STUPID DO YOU THINK I AM?
SH: Perhaps we should conclude our interview here.  I thank you for speaking with me today, Kerrar.
K: As well you should, smooth-skin.

END

74

General Discussion / Re: Theme song.

« on: September 05, 2021, 10:06:23 am »

Locke

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k8U8gjFx9Vk

75

General Discussion / Re: Theme song.

« on: September 05, 2021, 09:57:34 am »

Lauriella Sithmore

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LVlDSzbrH5M