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Journals & Backgrounds / Re: The Mystery of Mistari
« on: August 12, 2021, 02:19:52 pm »
I had planned to leave today. Another city, another failure. The Maiden has blessed me with a pain that I can not endure.
How did mother do it? She was able to work with both sides and better those who were in need while causing those who deserved it to suffer.
Why do they refuse aid? They rail against the insults and name calling yet they act in ways that prove the arrogant to be exactly right.
I've lost someone I thought was a friend because he does not want to better himself. He prefers to be the brute monster that everyone sees him as.
That hurts.
What allies are left? Both sides of the conflict are just as stubborn and arrogant. The middle ground is only out for coin. They could be of use but only if I can show them how they would profit.
I am just a failure all around. I am certain I'll be killed soon, or at least severely beaten. This town seems to thrive off of its hostilities.
I follow the Maiden of Pain but this is just chaos for the sake of chaos.
I gave Boy his freedom. I am not worthy to be Mistress of someone against their will. I told him to do what he wishes.
He is the one that has convinced me to stay. He removed his collar, I think that might have hurt more than the pain I was already experiencing. But, he wishes to be part of the house.
I don't feel I have the right to even have a house right now, let alone brand someone into it for life. He will eventually leave. I will spare him the life oath.
Saul is still missing. He has sent no word. If I leave, he would not be able to find me. Where would I go anyway?
So, here I sit. Useless.
How did mother do it? She was able to work with both sides and better those who were in need while causing those who deserved it to suffer.
Why do they refuse aid? They rail against the insults and name calling yet they act in ways that prove the arrogant to be exactly right.
I've lost someone I thought was a friend because he does not want to better himself. He prefers to be the brute monster that everyone sees him as.
That hurts.
What allies are left? Both sides of the conflict are just as stubborn and arrogant. The middle ground is only out for coin. They could be of use but only if I can show them how they would profit.
I am just a failure all around. I am certain I'll be killed soon, or at least severely beaten. This town seems to thrive off of its hostilities.
I follow the Maiden of Pain but this is just chaos for the sake of chaos.
I gave Boy his freedom. I am not worthy to be Mistress of someone against their will. I told him to do what he wishes.
He is the one that has convinced me to stay. He removed his collar, I think that might have hurt more than the pain I was already experiencing. But, he wishes to be part of the house.
I don't feel I have the right to even have a house right now, let alone brand someone into it for life. He will eventually leave. I will spare him the life oath.
Saul is still missing. He has sent no word. If I leave, he would not be able to find me. Where would I go anyway?
So, here I sit. Useless.