I am not in the habit of keeping a record of my life, but so much has happened recently it's been difficult to sort my thoughts. It is my hope that writing them down will help give me clarity I am sorely needing.

Today, our group chanced upon the plans of a tribe of gnolls to attack a nearby village. We arrived too late to save them. This leaves a particularly bitter taste in my mouth as it reminds me all too much of my past. Of the time my friends and family were all cut down before my eyes by orcs. The foul creatures spread such horror and despair with gleeful expressions of bloodlust and ecstasy. I hate them...I think I'll always hate them. Ogres, trolls, gnolls and the like are no better. They're all stupid brutes that live for nothing other than to destroy. I would crush them all had I the power...but I do not.

I can do nothing for the victims of the past, but I can do much for the victims of the future. Every evil creature I cut down is another innocent victim saved. One less filthy parasite to prey on the weak. To that end, I must become stronger. Strong like Snacks or The Reaver, Isabeau. I deeply respect and admire their strength and aspire to such heights. Such strength feels so far away from me, however. I pursue it so doggedly, yet it comes so slowly. It frustrates me. I want to inspire terror in the hearts of evil they way they terrorize innocents. I'm just not there yet.

Lately I've begun to think that perhaps I should seek out other things aside from revenge. Such thoughts led me to a meeting for the Tel'Quessir. There, I met others who welcomed me openly and warmly. I've made friends that I am proud to stand beside. I was given a flower by Celebrithrade and, while I would normally dismiss and discard such a trivial thing, I can't seem to bring myself to. It was a gift from the first real friend I've made in these lands. It warms my heart to look upon it and think of the friendship it represents.

As much as I love the new bonds I've been building, a fear grows inside me. Sometimes when I look at Celebrithrade, I can hear the screams of my kin as they were cut down and a cold terror grips my heart. I don't know what I would do if I lost her as well. That's why I've taken it upon myself to protect her with my life, if need be. She can be naive to a fault, but her endless optimism and love have the potential to change the world for the better. I truly believe that. I, on the other hand, can only endlessly hate my enemies.

For now, the hunt continues. I hope that in the coming days, I will find my own way to impact the world.