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Journals & Backgrounds / Re: The Night Star - Teuivae Surin

« on: October 24, 2019, 03:23:21 pm »

Perhaps this is the chance I was meant to find. I met with Zazie, a local expert and hin who's very knowledgeable and been kind to me. I told her of my dreams, who the moonlight kisses my skin, of a twilight sky and she searched through her various books to assist me in finding an answer. Upon her stacks, she came across an entry (in a language I'm unfamiliar with) that spoke of someone going through some sort of angelic transformation - they died however, but I could not tell if this was from the transformation itself or some sort of conflict that happened before the entry. I did not ask either.

However it spoke of a Mulhorand deity named Bastet whom Zazie claimed was an ally of Selune's and that she suspected druids may have the answer to my blood awakening. Normally, one may question her motivation as she could've told me anything in truth, but there are simply too many ways for this to get out of her control if she was wanting to manipulate me - and I've a great deal of experience in such matters. So with her suggestion, Neasa and I are going to seek a druidess by the name of Sable. Hopefully she can assist or point me in the right direction and if not? I shall not let this matter rest. Selune knows that my resolve has gotten me this far!

On a side note, I need to write a report concerning miss Zazie...

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Journals & Backgrounds / Re: The Night Star - Teuivae Surin

« on: October 23, 2019, 05:49:33 am »

I passed the second trial Neasa set before me! Without knowing it, in fact. She had tasked me to heal someone without asking for payment and there was no requirement on whom or for what reason. A 'lass' (now I'm starting to use Neasa's language, haha) by the name of Selniin if I remember correctly was visiting the Chapter House and had some sickness from the red mist. I stood up and asked if she would pray every night to Selune for me and I'd do the same, so that she may be cured. I placed what blessings I could upon her in hopes that the Moonmaiden was listening - simply because I had hoped she would be cured. Selniin seems to have such a pure heart. That's when Neasa suddenly proclaimed I had passed the task given to me. I can't say I don't feel a sense of pride every time Neasa praises me, as if I am bringing her and Selune honor.

I learned a little more of Menner as well, this undead cleric of Shar. Apparently he some plan to attack the Order. While Neasa seemed worried about some recent news about him, I couldn't help but just feel Selune's glow in my heart. No matter what happens to the Order or the Knights.... I think we will be fine. Selune will guide us and shine her light on us.

Which brings me to my last thought of this entry. Sherina is difficult to get a hold of and with how the enclave operates, I'm not keen to seek aid with the arcanist guild. So for now, I shall do the only thing that truly makes sense on my journey - I will pray to Selune for guidance. If she blesses this path, to awakening my celestial blood, may I be so honored as to get a nudge in the right direction. Perhaps it will work out with Sherina in the end, but what I know for sure is this - I will not give up. I won't let the dream just fade away into nothingness when I have a genuine chance to awaken my blood...

... Selune, please shine your light on my path.

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Journals & Backgrounds / Re: The Night Star - Teuivae Surin

« on: October 21, 2019, 07:01:53 am »

What a turn of events, indeed. I lay in bed, ready to fall asleep as my heart sings. Neasa Lawley is truly an angel and I am blessed by Selune herself for having such a beautiful knight in my life. To think I was nervous in sharing my preferences seems so silly now. After telling her, she took to commanding me like fish to water and every single moment, it was laced with a feeling of love and respect that I've come to truly expect from her. We kissed for the second and third time and my heart glows. I do believe now that Amaunator and Selune brought us together to support one another and grow with one another. I am truly honored to give her my heart.

On to other matters of importance however, are these dreams. They are distracting at best and tiring at worst, but as so many assume - they are not nightmares. It's like the heavens to me, to dream of the flight, the feel of winds in my hair and feathered wings, and the moonlight's warm glow on my skin. What causes me to be restless is when I'm awake - a consistent nagging and longing for this second life I've never had.

I need to seek Sherian however. Zazie was most helpful in sharing knowledge of records concerning these dreams. She mentioned a history of individuals having similar dreams and either they simply changed on their own or they did 'something' (which was not explained at the time) to awaken the blood. Though it sounded like the most common was that of dragons, it was not unheard of regarding celestial and fiendish blood. She mentioned most of these people were blood casters or minstrels. So asking Neasa, she told me that Sherian was one such blood caster that she trusted... I'm not sure what will happen or how this will turn out, but I must try. I can't just turn away from these dreams!

49

Journals & Backgrounds / Re: The Night Star - Teuivae Surin

« on: October 20, 2019, 06:24:04 am »

I'm sitting in the Valstiir, among the books of the library with a stirring in my heart. I was worried the night before - I had always had dreams of flying, of clouds at dusk where moon and sun meet, but never had it been so strong as it was last night. Even now as I write, I can recall the feeling of wind in my face, in my hair, in the wings I don't have, and feel the moon's light glowing on my skin - it was so real upon my waking that it took me several moments to realize I had no wings, no glow, no warmth about it. It weighed on my mind all day, as something like that would on anyone's mind.

I am blessed however with Neasa's presence. Perhaps she is right to believe we were met to meet together, revolving and drawing to one another like the sun and moon - Amaunator and Selune. Certainly it warms my heart to feel her presence, her hands on mine, to feel her arms around me. She comforted me by explaining that perhaps I had distant celestial blood or perhaps I'm like her and it's been suppressed by the darkness in my own life. So after writing this entry, I will be researching on the celestials themselves - she said for her, she saw Astral Devas and felt a connection... perhaps I shall as well. Furthermore, I'll be trying to find if anyone else has recorded individuals having such strong, suggesting dreams before. I hope to find something. It's like something has been calling out to me for a while, but now it's in my face, trying to shake me awake...

Also I wish to note Arkelos. I overheard him and he asked questions not often asked - what of those whom we fight? Do they have dreams, hopes, goals, pains, and nightmares? I'm glad I was able to talk to him. Encourage him to keep questioning. I do not go into every battle with the thought that this bandit or this necromancer will surrender - but the instant they do, I shall accept it. We cannot truly show Selune's light of acceptance and forgiveness if we either do not accept the chance for them to be redeemed or hold blade to neck and demand it. To bathe in Selune's light is the means to challenge evil not for evil's sake, but to protect others so they may live a good, healthy, and peaceful life. I've no doubt that this is what Selune wishes, in the end.

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Journals & Backgrounds / Re: The Night Star - Teuivae Surin

« on: October 18, 2019, 03:42:04 pm »

Is it Neasa that inspires me to write or is it Selune or just the idea of maybe one day my life will be more known than it is now? Suppose it doesn't matter, in truth. Yesterday started out in frustration as I attempted to help an old man route some undead in some red mist he had mentioned but found myself ill-equipped for the task. Much of my life has been spent being criticized for not being good enough, for being a failure, a disgrace, disgusting, ignored, abandoned... the point being is when I failed at a task that I thought I'd be able to do, I was far too hard on myself. Thanks to Shi and Sherian, I calmed down with words of encouragement and warm embraces. As for Neasa... I will touch on her later.

Later I accompanied Wulvarax into crypts to destroy the undead and even found a cult - to which I reported. Before going however I challenged the half-gold dragon to pause a moment and think. I questioned why we sought out evil so strongly and at first I was a bit concerned and still am, with his zealous nature to want to hunt evil like some sort of plague. While true fiends and undead are nearly impossible to redeem, many creatures at least have the chance to find peace. Thankfully, he agreed, which put me at ease - and truth be told he was wise about it. Just because redemption is on the table, does not mean you go into an encounter without caution. I hope he becomes a fine knight someday.

I will say this though... during our journey, I feel light swell in me and found myself able to give healing to Wulvarax in a way that I was unable to before, much like clergy. I never attended the church officially though nor went through any training - does she really bless me so? I have felt closer to her lately, the feeling of moonlight, goodness, acceptance, wanting to protect others from evil. I will be spending time that normally I'd spend training my blade to simply meditate on this connection. I enjoy feeling close to the Moonmaiden.

Neasa - it's difficult for me to put her into words. Truly, she was the key one to calm me down earlier. Just hearing that I haven't let her down filled me with pride and encouragement. I know I fancy her. She is noble, honorable, passionate, kind, and protective and I'm blessed to have her in my life. Though she is amusingly oblivious to my feelings. I even told her I fancied someone and she knew her, haha. I look forward to her reaction when she figures it out in time. I do hold the belief that if she meant to be with me, I will not have to make the first mention of it, though I've hinted at it. I hope something comes of it, eventually.

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Journals & Backgrounds / The Night Star - Teuivae Surin

« on: October 18, 2019, 01:09:56 am »

[To read Teuivae's beginnings.]

I saw Neasa once writing in a journal, though I dare not disrespect her by ever reading it, but it gave me the idea to perhaps write my own. Of course, I cannot promise that I will write in this all the time - after all, it took her writing to even give me the idea, but I might as well recount the recent happenings.

First and foremost, or perhaps most obviously, has been my welcoming into the Order of the Guiding Hand as a squire. Neasa, a knight-errant herself, was the one who insisted I join the Order. I did not expect as much, but for the first time I feel like I have a family in the Order. My own parents neglected me and I've been subject to abuse more times than I care to recount... so it feels odd, in the best of ways, to find acceptance and encouragement. Though truly, it's Neasa that thinks of me the most.

That aside, I've come to discover that Selune favors me on some measure of a scale - I can channel her holy light through me just as much as Neasa can, whom is a paladin of Amaunator! I thought it odd that I could do such things - I've never been a part of any training or oath-taking and yet Selune has seen fit to bless me. Each and every day, I feel closer to her - her light, her forgiveness, her fierce protectiveness, her acceptance. I like to believe that through my life, my thoughts of her have guided me... and she must of heard me, along the way.

The future looks bright indeed. With Selune above and the Order to my side... nothing can ever tear me down again. I hope I honor everyone's expectations. Shi even forged a blade - Elladyr I've called her.. 'Starstrike'. That's all I want in life is to spread Selune's light and goodness so that people can live in peace and be spared the horrors I endured.